I want to yell at you. I want to get angry with you and everyone. It feels good sometimes, it makes me feel like I have power, I feel like I have retribution, I feel like I have defended myself, my honor and my self respect.....
Well, maybe not. Truth is, when I get angry at someone I feel like shit. I have never experienced a reason to get angry at someone. Once I get angry I am not present, not able to be a mirror for the other, not myself.
Once I get angry I become my past, my fears, my worries. I am not me, here and now, I am back then.
when I feel angry I have three choices....
1. Ignore it. Not an option for anything
2. Breath, recognize it and accept it as a teaching of some trigger I have. I can learn from that trigger, that pain and thank the person or situation that has angered me. I can see it as a teaching
3. I get angry. Not a valuable option.
I must accept and deal with my own shit. It is mine and mine alone. I collect and use tools, many of them to help me understand, use and create with my emotional self.
I find peace in myself and in no one else.
No comments:
Post a Comment